60 SHADES OF ROB
There was movement up in Brisbane for the word had passed around
That the gal with no regrets had got away;
She had joined the wild bush walkers at Mt Coottha stomping ground
So all her mates have gathered to the fray.
Trouble is, no one can catch her when her blood is fairly up
As she sails up to the heights, ipod in ears;
There are those who still remember when this gal was just a pup
And the thought of mountains fuelled her gravest fears.
All the tried and noted party types from town and bush alike
Have gathered here at Langside House today
While we cannot hope to match Rob on a Coottha mountain hike
When it comes to grog we’ll have our merry way.
There’s the Higgenses who gave their home to welcome you at last
Despite a dummy theft some years ago
And Bags has cooked for years it seems to make this great repast
While PeeWee’s art makes it a magic show.
Who is this person who’s created all this merry fuss?
This Robyn with the famous toothy grin?
How is that one little bird has so affected us
That we’ve gone to SO MUCH TROUBLE to get you in?
She was born a simple country girl out west of Roma side
God knows she had no shoes til she was ten
So her parents sent her South to rub the prickles off her hide
Negs knew that they were in for trouble then!
It wasn’t that a bad thought ever crossed this darling’s mind
It wasn’t that she knew original sin
It was just that her sweet nature was of the spirited kind
And I guess it was the company she was in.
But she made it to the end despite some harrowing narrer shaves
Like the time she picked the groundsman’s carrot crop
Not to mention the dead snake event that almost killed Miss Graves
No; she left with great distinction with our crop.
Then – to Uni! Uni found a niche for this young virgin child
(And Mareanne assisted her demise)
Our Robyn soon discovered life was better for the Wild
Tho for Jayce and Millie there was no reprise.
They watched with growing horror as their gorgeous girl grew wings
And sprouted hair in unexpected places
She had a go at everything – she even tried to sing!
And eschewed those famous Chandler airs & graces
It was a torrid time for those who loved her innocence
And decried the use of alcohol and dope;
But we her mates thought it a marvellous series of events
Although we had to hide away our blokes.
It wasn’t that she went for them – no, not at all, I vow
It was a case of sweet unconscious charm
And she was just as gorgeous then as she stands before you now
And the boys went mad – she didn’t mean no harm!
She went to England where she tried her hand at Harpenden
Ice skating on the lake with me and Mike
We went to Austria skiing – round the pubs and back again
And the whole London adventure for this tyke.
Once back home it was to Sydney with the lights and Harbour bridge
And Chrissie made her shave her underarms
Rob met Johnny – he was smitten – so was she – t’was ridgy didge
And they moved to Werris Creek with all its charms.
But first to Brunei playing polo for a wealthy king
There precious Gemma joined their family mix
While back home at Glen Alpine mud houses were their thing
And visitors were invited to make bricks.
Once Robbie found that babies made her titties grow her tears
Were tears of unrelenting womanly joy
She suckled them unceasingly for all of twenty years
And Gemma was soon joined by 2 sweet boys.
The country life was wonderful but Queensland called her back
(They say you always come back in the end)
They plied their goods and chattels on the worn and dusty track
Much to the joy of all their Queensland friends.
Rob bent her back to working and it seemed to give her pleasure
All sorts of dreams & schemes went through that house
While out at Logan and more places I alone could measure
She taught many little darlings to talk nice.
But now – she’s nudging sixty; and we think it’s time she knew
That she should be grey and wrinkly like us all.
But it seems she keeps on going like that celebrated few
Who manage to avoid the aging call.
Her smile is just as broad and just as gorgeous as of old
Her laugh still tinkles on the evening breeze
Her dash is just as dashing, her approach is just as bold
And she still makes old men wobbly at the knees.
And we know that when the time arrives for our quiet twilight years
As we sit and ponder over misspent youth
Old codgers will be queueing with rheumy eyes and hairy ears
To touch the hand of Robyn and find Truth.
Rob it gives us all such pleasure to extol you in this way
We love you more that words can ever tell
We’ve been with you on your journey from the dummy to today
We’ll be with you at the Pearly gates as well.
9th December 2012 Luvya © jano